Posts Tagged ‘2017’

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The Hunchback of Sleepy Hollow

October 26, 2017

Having crossed the bridge, Ichabod relaxes and he tells his disabled hero, “We’re safe. The demon cannot cross running water.”

Quasimodo cries taunts at the headless horseman. “Sanctuary, sanctuary!”

The horseman then dismounts his black stead upon the opposite shore. The demon then finds a pumpkin patch and begins tossing the gourds into the water. So many pumpkins go into the stream that the flow slows to a trickle then stops…

Happy Halloween!

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Fumigator of Souls

October 15, 2017

My neighbor behind me is a slob, Exterminators have told me so much. The man never cleans his apartment. His place is infested with bugs. My bathroom and his kitchen share the plumbing and the east wall. Cockroaches come through the plaster and between wooden beams. They squeeze under un-stuck caulk and into my bathtub.

When they stare up at me, each pressing themselves up onto a slanted, six-legged stance, I sometimes think, “If reincarnation were true, and there was a karma that only the sacrifice of life satisfies, I think they beg me for death.

Sure, a last surge of self-preservation overcomes them all before each are squashed, but they go to a better life, I suppose. If it all were true, I make believe I satisfy karma in acting as their executioner. And as an atheist, I have no concern for an afterlife of my own. In my time on earth, I become a remorseless fumigator of souls.

 

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These Harvey Weinstein Days

October 15, 2017

Something we should keep in perspective during these Harvey Weinstein days…

Per Google’s dictionary definition, sexual harassment is “harassment (typically of a woman) in a workplace, or other professional or social situation, involving the making of unwanted sexual advances or obscene remarks.”

Per a 21st century Radical Feminist, sexual harassment is a circumcision. A right of passage. And as a radical feminist, it’s not if a woman is raped, it is when. And that rape can be as significant as her male co-worker accidentally sipping from her coffee mug at work. A woman these days needs the merit badge in order to call herself a true feminist.

I’m not defending Harvey, I’m telling you that pretenders will come out of the far left to advance a radical feminist agenda. One in which women wholly replace male leaders in governing bodies, despite qualification. I think the exact quote made by feminist employers is, “I hired her, because as a woman, she is infinitely qualified for any position occupied by a man.”

 

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A Reminder: Halloween is Coming!

September 22, 2017

There is a cemetery I know that has a clubhouse. A clubhouse, with a bar and a restaurant, like a golf course. Arcadia Green, it’s called. The clubhouse is cryptically called Gothic. The place is open to the public after six. A placard in the ceiling-to-floor window list its hours of operations until midnight, everyday except Sunday. I was there for a friend. It was his birthday. He has always enjoyed arcane places.

He went outside to smoke, as that was the law in this state. I stayed inside because I don’t. The only other person I talked to went to the restroom , so I fell into an old habit of eavesdropping. There is a couple in a booth next to our own group’s, which was in an unlit corner. The windows about us were solid dark. There are no clocks, but it is obvious the day was well past sundown.

“I lived in Los Angeles for a while, too much sun,” the young, casually adorned man said to an anxious woman. He sounded as if he made an introduction. I had the impression they were probably on a first date. Although I was not watching the couple, I did glimpse them and saw they were not sitting close.

She tells him something curiously believable. “To be honest,” she said, “Men used to chase me when I was younger. I got wise with age and I now stick close to home, deal with what I know.”

Their conversation abruptly ended. I didn’t look, but when I had glimpsed, I did see them examining menus. Their menus were not the same as our own, but we were a special occasion.

“I don’t want kids,” the young man stated with uncertainty. He sounded as if he yet contemplated his future.

“What? Why?” his date inquired. She sounded surprised instead of disappointed or dejected.

He tells her, “I don’t like how they scream when you bite into them.”

“But that’s the best part,” she told him.

 

Halloween is coming!

 

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A Life Without Fear or Guilt

March 8, 2017

I don’t have kids, but I’ve recently thought how to talk to them. As a childless adult, I’ve forgotten how. I think the best approach is just to be honest and frank… about religion, politics and death.

I’d start and say, “You’re probably going to die. I mean everyone dies. In your lifetime, doctors and scientists may find a way to prolong life, stumble upon immortality, yet, even then, what we know is that means more pain from wear, tear and disease. What kind of life would you have once everyone you’ve known, your family and friends, your pets and heroes, have all passed away? You will want to die, and that is a sad state of existence. It’s often easiest to just be done with it all. Death is a blessing in disguise. But who wants to die when they are young and they have so many wants… to do, to go, to see? Live life to it’s fullest.”

“And a full life is led without fear Sure, fear is good – you don’t want to get bit by a dog (or any animal or person), you don’t want to fall and break a bone. You don’t want a life of pain, but then again, how bad could it be? There’s only one way to find out, but fear will stifle curiosity – and the pleasure of curiosity is always the one thing that will keep your will alive. Don’t be afraid.”

Fear will led to anger and guilt and convince you to believe in things that are not true. And to believe and act upon things that are not true only brings pain to others and yourself. And by yourself, I mean guilt. Guilt for things you’ve done or not done will come with you throughout life, it gets heavy as you get old.

Guilt is the one pain you want to always avoid, because it often won’t just go away. Sure, you might forget about it for awhile, but it’s still there and only grows. It’s that weight you can’t throw off in old age, especially after everyone but you have died.

Live without fear and avoid guilt… I mean, don’t just ignore it, guilt that is, kill it with kindness – love for others and yourself. Love curiosity and satisfy your cravings. Share what joys you find with others. Share the joy of a fearless life without guilt with everyone you know, because, as I’ve said, we all die and there will come a day when you don’t want to be alone.

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The Sins of the One Outweigh the Faith of the Many

January 8, 2017

Many Americans ask what has become those rhetorical questions, “Why are Republicans pro-life? Why does the life a newborn take precedence over that of a mother? Why is abortion not an option even when the health and welfare of a child is questionable?”

We know that “pro-life” attitude only pertains up to the birth of a child. After then, they and their families are all on their own. But, why?

The answer is Biblical. It’s that commandment, “Thou shall not kill.” Breaking that commandment as well as any of the other nine sends someone’s soul the Hell.

But, surely, it would be the doctor who would pay that price, and maybe the mother, too. Let me borrow a tired euphemism of our new president and say, “Wrong!” Those Ten Commandments are in the Old Testament, written long before Jesus walked Creation in the flesh, before the promise of forgiveness through confession or grace through faith.

See, those commandments were then written by a wrathful god. That was when He (or to be fair, She) was still prone to flood the Earth.

Okay, God promised there would be no more floods. But, that one deluge was before Sodom and Gomorrah, so us mortals can’t be so trusting. Even then, He/She was still rash and not as omniscient as believers hope. God had to send an angel to investigate His/Her suspicion. And finding only one righteous soul in the city, He/She again brought destruction to the planet; a smaller devastation, to be sure, but still horrific.

So, despite a pretty rainbow and even Jesus, the distrustful faithful believe the wrath of God to this day is visited upon swaths of mortals for the sins of a few and even the one. That’s how paranoid those religious folks have become.

AIDS, 9-11, hurricanes, oil spills and droughts are modern evidence of situations in which God has lifted His/Her hand because He/She has become so disgusted with those made in His/Her image that only death quells His/Her rage. He/She used to get blood sacrifices but that was not always enough.

There is why women today are forced to give birth, why drug users are locked away instead of freed on their own recognizance, and homosexuality is disdained. It’s not just an individual’s soul that is seen at risk, rather the country itself. Because despite the love and patience of Jesus, our savior still has an angry dad/mom.

(Hell, inferring God may be a woman probably pisses Him off. Blame the opioid epidemic and shrinking middle class on that. And give Him the blood a goat, for Christ’s sake. Maybe that will help Him chill.)

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